Learning to Celebrate Yourself Every Step of the Way
One day, I was talking with a group of my girlfriends. We hadn’t seen each other in a while, and we had a long game of checkup. But as the conversation went on it turned into, well let’s be honest, a bitchfest.
It got to the point where it was constant one up game of who hasn’t accomplished what, who was still single, who had kids but no husband, a husband but no kids, who had a degree they didn’t use, or were in job that they hated. There was one common theme. They all felt they hadn’t lived up to expectations. Expectations from society, their family, their peers… Themselves.
Now don’t get me wrong, I was not a silent participant of this conversation by any means. Of course, there are things in life I wish I had, or wish were different. And girl time is when you can get it all out! All that frustration, those worries, those “can you believe” moments you can finally get out there. Side note, if you don’t have at least one friend that you can go to, to lay it all out there, well babe you need some stronger relationship building but we will get to that another time.
As I was sitting there, listening to one of the girls it dawned on me, how in the world did we get from laughing to one upping each other on what we viewed as our own unfulfillment. Why would she view it a bad thing to be a mom but still working on a career or her who has worked as an intern and worked for two companies, but it hasn’t found the right company to call home yet.
We put so much stock into what we feel that we should have accomplished by now that we lose site of all that we have accomplished up until now. Girl there is at least one thing you have done that is worth celebrating. And I mean CELEBRATING! Not a little, “okay, great” now on to the next, or little pat on the shoulder, I’m talking scream from the roof top celebrate! Do you have a degree? Hell yes, girl you killed it. Are you a mom? Way to carry and care for those little ones! What about getting accepted to a program? Boom, you got in! How about you woke up today, got ready and went to work? Yes babe, you’re on fire, put that work in. Worked out today? Yes girl yes, all the gains. You got your kiddo ready today? Oh my, feat accomplished!
CELEBRATE YOUR DAMN YOURSELF!
We get so caught up with focusing everything on the future that we literally miss everything that is wonderful about right now. Babe, look around you! Think on who you have in your life the makes it great. Embrace them! Do you have a working vehicle that gets you from point A to point B? That’s a win. A roof over your head that protects you? Yay not being outside in the elements when they turn nasty. Got clothes on your back? Amazing, no public indecency ticket for you. Some food in the frig to fuel your body and mind? Perfect, you eat that burger. Have money in the bank to pay for life or savings for when life happens. Get it.
Babe, life is what you make it.
Society tells us we need to be and do everything. A working woman, a caretaker, a home maker, a child raiser, and look fucking fabulous while we do it; and that is just to name a few. Add in the pressure to be and do it perfectly 24/7. Good God it is wonder how we aren’t all on Xanax. Society can shove it. The pressure to have everything together all the time is unrealistic. Listen again, it is UNREALISTIC, to be on point 24/7. Life happens babe and that is a fact. ENJOY what you have right now. Now don’t think I’m saying to not focus on chasing those dreams. I think one of the scariest things in life is being the same person 10 years from now that I am today. Don’t you dare give up on working toward bettering yourself (by your standards) and doing the things you want to accomplish. Just don’t get frustrated that it may not happen in your timeline. There have been so many times when I expect to have accomplished something and it doesn’t work out right away or hell never even happens. Don’t get discourage babe, you got this. Right here, right now whatever you’re working on, focus on that, not how it will yield you x, y, and z when you complete it but really focus on what you’re doing right now. And for God sake, have fun while you do it.
Tell me what the point is? If you have a goal, I’ll be the first to back you a 100%. I know what it’s like to have others doubt you and I know how much that hurts. So let’s get that out of the way. I believe in your goals. You can accomplish anything you set your mind to AND put the work in for. But what is the point, after all that hard work if you don’t learn to celebrate each and every step that got you to accomplishing your goal? What have you learned about yourself that helped get to each step? Take some time to reflex on what it took to accomplish that goal, no matter how big or small. And remember, please for the love of God, remember to CELEBRATE your wins babe. You put in the work, you ought to cheer for yourself. Then you can move on to the next step to ultimately reaching that out of the world dream that is all your own.
